A Camera, a Celebrity, and a Catastrophe
by E.M.Bryant97
Summary: When various celebrities come to visit Storybrooke, things don't go quite as planned...
1. Oprah Winfrey

**A/N:** I honestly don't know where this idea came from... But enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Once Upon a Time, any of its characters, or any of the references made on here. This story means no offence to anything or anyone, purely for comical use.

* * *

Storybrooke had always been known for its oddities. An evil queen posing as a mayor and adopting her step great grandson as her own son was just the beginning. But nothing could compare to what happened one dismal Tuesday night...

Ruby had just finished grooming herself down at the pet store, and was strolling down Grover street when a conspicuous sound came from behind.

"Who's there?" She growled, looking around veraciously. Then, out of the black night, someone appeared. Well, not just someone. _The,_ someone.

"Oh my gosh- Oprah? Oprah Winfrey?!"

She wore a grin like she were made of money, her camera crew surrounding her like they were the FBI.

"That's me, well, last time I checked,"

"Wha- what are you doing here?" Ruby asked, noticing the microphone in her hand.

"Here to interview the mysterious fairytale peoples of Storybrooke Maine of course- what an interesting red hood you have."

Ruby blushed. "Red's kinda my thing."

"Wait, don't tell me... Cinderella, right?"

"Uhh, no.."

"Rumplestilskin?"

"No,"

"Iron Man?"

"Not even close!"

Oprah gritted her sparkly teeth and turned towards her crew. "That's what I get from learning fairy tales from you losers."

"Red Riding Hood." Ruby confirmed, catching sight of the big camera. "Are we on air?"

"Yes here with me live is red riding hood herself folks," Oprah smiled prefusiveley towards the lends, "so tell me Red- can I call you Red? How is life knowing you're a real life bitch?"

Ruby frowned. "Prefer wolf. But life got a whole lot easier once I realized I'm a furry beast at night during a full moon and a prostitute during the day. Now I can freely drink toilet water without my granny judging me.. As harshly."

Before Oprah could ask another question, someone caught their attention.  
Regina Mills, non chelantly walking out of Dr. Whale's house late at night, quickly crossed the road and met up with them and the crew.

"Oprah, what on earth are you doing here?" Regina beamed as if they had been friends all their lives.

"Ugh, you again. Never thought I'd see you of all people here,"

"In a town I created?" She laughed, "you haven't aged a bit."

"How do you two know each other?" Ruby interjected, the camera still rolling.

"Long story." Oprah mumbled, "but here you have it folks, the one and only Evil Queen!"

A button was pressed from an unknown source, and an applause track was played. "Yes yes, it is I, Regina Mills, mayor of this fine town and- still single." She then jerked the microphone out of Ms. Winfrey's hands. "But in case you people haven't heard, I've changed for the good now."

"Give it back!"

"Love you Henry, I didn't murder Archie!"

"Seriously-"

"Hate you with all my heart Mother! Stay horrible!"

Ruby then proceeded to yank the microphone from their hands. Oprah then smacked Regina on the side of the head, resulting in a full on fistfight.

"Uh, sorry for that..." Ruby said awkwardly, the camera crew filling up the screen trying to break up the fight.

"Now back to Richie back at the office!"

"There's no Richie in the office." One of the crew members muttered.

"How would you like to know how to eat your boyfriend in three easy steps?"

At the Charming household, David sat slouched in his leather recliner in front of a plasma TV, eating chocolate Bon boons and wasted as heck. The house was dark except for the glow of the television; Mary Margret, Emma and Henry were all sound asleep, all snoring like a freight train.

David flipped through the guide, looking half dead, until he stopped at the OWN channel.

"Ha, ha, that looks like Regina and Ruby are talking to Oprah." He then paused, taking a look at their surroundings. "Hey, I wanna be on TV too." He muttered like whiny boy, getting up and stumbling towards the door.

Once he got there, the scene before him wasn't pretty. Regina and Oprah were still hitting each other, and Ruby was demonstrating how to do wolf to human recitation. He picked up the microphone and faced the camera with a full sized grin.

"Hi, I'm on TV..." He waved at the screen. The few remaining crew members then gathered together behind David and raised a baseball bad above his head, bringing it down hard and dragging his body out of the camera set.

The desperate wails of her father woke up Emma Swan from her lovely dream about a troll names Francis and had her soon walking the cold halls of the house. She got to Mary Margret's room and shook her violently.

"Wake up!" She hissed, throwing off her covers. When there was no response from her, Emma tried again. "Oprah's in Storybrooke!"

Snow White then awoke with a start, wiping the drool off the side of her face.

"Did you say Oprah?"

"Yes, now get up!"

She then followed Emma out the bedroom door, wearing a bright orange onesie. Before they could get out the door, though, a ten year old boy stopped them.

"I wanna meet Oprah too!" Henry said in a perky voice. "I loved her interview with Lance Armstromg the other day."

"Get back to bed-"

"Wait... How to you know about Lance Armstrong?" Emma questioned eerily.

"No time, we gotta get over there!" Henry said, grabbing her hand. They took off down the middle of the street.

By the time they got to the camera site, they were all out of breath and breathing like they were being chased by rabid monkeys.

"Archie, how'd you get here before us?" Mary Margret gasped, seeing him talking to the screen about different therapy techniques.

"I just hopped over." He said, once he finished.

"What's up with Regina over there?"

He shrugged. "Don't know. They were chewing each other's hair when I got there."

"And why is my husband crying?"  
"I... Don't know."

Henry darted over to Oprah, who was about to pick up a metal pole, and waved.  
"You're my biggest fan! Can I get your autograph?"

"After- I teach- your mother- a lesson-" she grunted, viciously swinging the pole at Regina. He shrugged his small shoulders and walked away and towards the camera, putting on an adorable pouty face. "Will you please help me? My two mothers won't get along with each other. Donate to the number on your screen now. Operators are waiting for your call. Make me a happy boy?"

"Henry, what did I say about soliciting?" Emma scolded, hands on her hips. She softened when she turned towards the camera.

"On the other hand, I'm a single mother and the savior of this town, trying to raise this poor boy and rip him from his adopted mother's custody-"

"Hey, I was talking," Archie protested, "where were we? Lying is a profession, so George Bush, there is still hope for you!" He then shoved Emma off the screen and sent her sprawled on the hard, wet ground.

"Come down over to Mr. Gold's pawn shop at your next stay in Storybrooke!" Came the voice of Rumplestiltskin, accompanied by Belle, who was holding a giant sign with the store's name in big, bold letters.

"Get your own TV network!" Mary Margret yelled, taking the advertisement and tearing it down the middle. The three of them began their own fight, sending up the noise levels through the roof.

"Turn it off!" Oprah screamed towards the crew, but no one was left. She wrenched herself out from Regina's death grip, got up, and ran as fast as she could towards the camera, switching it off. Her clothes were ripped and torn, and she was only wearing one shoe.

"You people are INSANE!" She shouted as she took off towards the town line.  
Emma picked herself up, whipping her butt and looking around. Standing right in front of the hoard of rouge fairytale characters was Cora, wearing a 'I 3 Winfrey' t-shirt and looking crestfallen.

"What did you do to all the crew members?"

"Just collected my jar of hearts," she shrugged. "...and may have killed them."

"What did I say about murdering innocent bystanders?"

Cora signed. "That it's wrong and rude..."

"Good. Now where's Hook?"

"Getting his eyebrows waxed,"

Everything around them was a complete wreck. It was like a tornado swept through the town. Regina stood up and held her head in her hands.

"What- happened?"

"I'll tell you what happened; you got beat up by a billionaire." Belle smirked.

"Hey, everyone, how about we get some Chinese food?" Henry shouted, making everyone around here go silent.

"Henry, it's almost midnight." Ruby contradicted.

Emma shrugged. "I could use some Chinese food,"

Everyone else have a collective nod, and with that, they all set off down the road, hand in hand, the new celebrities of America.

* * *

**A/N:** Hopefully this didn't suck too badly. My apologies of I offended even a single soul by writing this. Really, I mean no harm. :)


	2. Ellen DeGeneres and Robert Carlyle

**A/N:** Due to a request *cough AngryMagic* a second chapter to this has been made! I honestly don't know about more, I'll just see what you guys have to say about it... ;)

**Disclaimer: **There is a lot of things mentioned in here, but I'm just giving a friendly reminder that I have not kidnapped Ellen or Robert and they are in complete ownership of themselves. I'm just a poor, pathetic teenager- I own nothing Once Upon a Time or any other reference I have on here.

* * *

**Ellen DeGeneres**

The PF Changs restaurant was soon jam packed with the battered and emotionally damaged citizens of Storybrooke.

"Pass the sauce!" Mary Margret snapped, face smeared with streaks of orange teriyaki sauce.

"Isn't this great?" Emma said with a full mouth, "Just the five, or ten, or thirty of us sitting in an oriental food place at two in the morning."

The brood all cheered in agreement, making no promises of not being drunk.

"Hey, that looks like Ellen!" Regina shouted, pointing a finger towards the window.

Everyone turned towards the huge back window, and saw The Ellen DeGeneres Show in big purple letters. There was a collective scream (especially from Henry) before all of them ran out outside.

Ellen had been on a tour to promote her new taco products when her mobile home broke down, and conveniently ended up in the middle of nowhere.

"ELLEN!" Came a fangirling Regina, arms flailing. She hugged her like she was mauling a bear.

"Somebody- help-" Ellen choked out. "Portia will not be happy about this..."

A few of her camera crew members were finally able to yank Regina off her, shoving her back towards the others.

"Hi Ellen, huge fan..." Emma grinned, pulling a coincidental autograph poster out from her bra. Ellen gave her a look, but clicked open a pen and signed it.

"Do you like videogames?" Came the small voice that belonged to Henry.

"Hell yeah I do!" She grinned back.

"Then come with me," Henry smiled, taking her hand; the two of them set off down the road towards the arcade store.

"Hey, wait a second!" Ruby yelled after them, "What if we want to hang out with Ellen too?!"

"Go eat a squirrel or something!" Henry shouted back with a smirk upon his face.

Once they got to the arcade, Henry set to work on picking the lock since it was long since closed. They were inside in a matter of minutes- all the various games glowing at them with pleasure.

He passed all the kiddy games such as Pac-Man and Chucky, stopping at the game of all games- Black Ops II.

"You up for this Ellen?" Henry asked with the classic rise of an eyebrow.

"Bring it on!"

And the killing of virtual humans commenced.

* * *

**Part II- Robert Carlyle**

Disappointed, the group of misfit fantasy characters didn't know what to do. One by one, they all trickled down the street like confused bees. Regina especially was beyond rankled. Her son who really wasn't her son was hanging out with the second most powerful lesbian on the planet.

It was still dark outside; though, it was only a few hours until the sun would rise again. Oprah and Ellen in one night. God should've just sent the whole Jackson 5 to boot.

She heard the sound of crashing leaves behind her. Suddenly, she turned, armed with a pointed yellow banana faced towards an older man with longish brown hair and a huge honker of a nose.

"The name's Carlyle. Robert Carlyle." The mysterious man growled deeply. Regina put the fruit down.

"Rumple? What the heck are you doing here?"

The man wore a look of extreme confusion. "Rumple? Why would such an attractive woman such as yourself compare me to such a grotesque excuse for a fairytale character?"

Regina looked muddled for a moment, then kicked him hard in the crotch. "You dated my mom you disgusting little rat!"

Robert gasped, bent over in pain, his fragile ego offended beyond measure.

"Unless your mom is Anastasia Shirley, then no..."

Still fuming, she raised her hand to slap him.

"Whoa Regina!" The real Rumplestiltskin shouted from behind, happening to be taking a walk at that exact moment in time. By the time he walked over to the two, he was face to face with Robert.

"Well hello there," Rumple said shockingly, raising an eyebrow.

"Who are you?"

"Who are you you sexy beast?"

"What is this witchcraft?"

Awkwardly, Regina walked away from their weird conversation after they started comparing foot sizes. One Scottish imp was enough for the town.

* * *

"Noooooo!" Cried Ellen, throwing the video game controller on the ground with impeccable force. "I cannot loose to an adorable ten year old!"

Henry smiled, switching the game off so the sound of killing soldiers wouldn't disrupt the victorious conversation. "Told you, I'm the master of Black Ops."

Ellen pouted. "Guess you win the fabulous prize of five iPads and two million fillers then..."

"You also mentioned a target gift card!"

"Ugh, I have got to stop giving away miraculous gifts!" She scolded herself.

Henry continued to show his glowing pride. "You can have your manager ship the goods. In the mean time, how about catching up with the others?"

Ellen didn't even have to comply. The pair started down the dreary street.

"Ellen! I knew you would come back!" Emma shouted, resisting the urge to leap onto her trillion dollar sequin jacket.

"We can travel the world and write wonderful short stories about our adventures!"

Ellen gave The Savior a I'm-going -to-kill- you-now stare. "Not my best night in history."

Regina then met back up with them, followed by the two Rumplestilskins.

"What the..." Everyone said in unison upon seeing them.

"How do you do," Robert tipped his hat. "I'm the real Rumplestilskin."

Rumple gave him an alarmed look. "No, I'm the real Rumplestilskin!"

"Don't listen to the imposter!"

The whole gang was completely terrified, like they saw a ghost. Regina ignored the two twits and turned her attention to Ellen. "You know, you and I are alike in so many ways. Think about it: Lana and Ellen; weekdays at right seven central."

"I work alone." Ellen said, dignified. "And anyways, aren't you and Emma over here in love or something? Queen Swan is all over Tumblr. And you two just make the most adorable couple."

Everyone horridly exchanged glances between Emma and Regina, yelling a collective "Ewwwwwww!" It was followed by numerous hacking noises.

'"On that note, think I'll be leaving now..." Ellen muttered, turning towards her crew. The trailer was out and ready to speed away at any second.

"You can't leave us!" David and Mary Margret both protested.

"I'm so leaving. You people are so weird."

Before she could get to the car though, someone stopped her. "Please take me with you!" Robert begged, grabbing hold of her arm desperately. "I can't live in this man's shadow any longer! My whole life is a lie!"

Ellen thought for a moment, then shrugged. "Okay. Shotgun goes to my pet rat Timothy. You get the trunk."

"Deal. Just get me out of here!" He said, dashing into the tiny little trunk. Ellen got in and quickly locked the doors. The car started with a vroom sound. Before it took off, she rolled down the window. "A plate of Portia's homemade ginger snaps for everyone!"

Then the trailer started down the street; everyone could hear Robert's joyous shouts for miles. "You guys enjoy those cookies," Henry grinned, "maybe I'll make some in my new penthouse."

The gang threw him a muddled look of shock. "Hey wait a minute..." Regina questioned, turning towards Rumple. "How do we know it was Robert who left with Ellen...?"

* * *

**A/N:** I must give a huge thank you to AngryMagic, who gave me the idea for this. You deserve a giant hug for your awesomeness :D And this is for anyone: any ideas for (if I were to do) another chapter? I'm open for anything.

Thanks to everyone who read!


	3. Tom Hiddleston and Adam Levine

**A/N: **Remember, I'm ALWAYS open for suggestions on people to add into the story. Any celebrity will do! And Marox, Florence Welch is coming in the next chapter! Still need another spot filled guys...

* * *

**Part I- Tom Hiddleston**

* * *

Weeks past after Storybooke's encounter with Ellen, and things went back to the way things always went in a nonexistent town. The most exciting thing that happened was when a new episode of The Walking Dead came on.

That is, until one fateful night...  
It was a cold and frightful Sunday night; snow flurried around in the sky like frozen glitter and everyone stayed cooped up inside playing full house poker. Ruby Lucas, the Chanel 11 weather anchor, smelled a 94.27% chance of a horrible blizzard coming overnight.

Dr Whale decided to brave the fierce winds to check his mail. He stifled down his street towards the mailbox, dying to see if his body parts (for medical purposes of course) had arrived from Sweden.

As he hurriedly picked out his key, he noticed a blurry figure standing a few feet away from where he was.

"Hey, what're you doing out here?!" Dr Whale shouted. Then he noticed something odd- the snow around the man was melted. The mysterious man caught his attention, and walked over towards him.

Whale's jaw dropped. "Oh my- you're, you're... TOM HIDDLESTON!"

Tom smiled. "Indeed I am. Do you mind telling me where I am? I was trying on some new shoes when I was whisked away by an unknown force. Are you people by chance Asguardians?"

"Umm.. No. We're the fabulous fairytale bunch of Storybrooke Maine!" He conjured.

"Oh!" His angelic face lit up, "from Once Upon a Time! Huge fan of your work. Do you by chance know Regina? We evil creatures gotta stick together you know,"

Whale nodded unconsciously. "She's with the others watching some kind of reality TV show. But first.." He pulled out a Thor 2: The Dark World movie poster from his pocket. "Will you sign this for me?"  
Tom took a glance at the poster and his smile fell. It was Chris Helmsworth wielding his hammer and Natalie Portman holding onto him extremely close. "Everyone loves Chris..." He muttered, signing his name in big letters across his face.

"I'll show you to Regina. You can stay here as long as you like. Just don't abandon us to fulfill your adventure by flying to Rio. We can't take anymore well acted broken hearts."

"Promise," he chuckled, following Whale back towards Granny's.

"By the way, thanks for warming me up. It's like the biftost out here."

Tom looked befuddled. "For some reason my extreme hotness is transforming the snow back into its natural state."

He smiled, and preceded to melt a pathway in front of them.

* * *

**Part II- Adam Levine**

* * *

Tom's magical voice drifted through the winding wind and attracted an ... unlikely visitor to Storybrooke. The wonderful and fabulous Adam Lavine was sitting peacefully in a coffee shop somewhere along the eastern seashore when he heard his song-like voice. Instantly, Adam got up, dramatically throwing his cup of java to the white tile floor.

"I must find the source of this aesthetic sound!" He muttered, hopping on his motorcycle.

The pop legend was zipping down the street, and started pulling citizens from the area like vultures to fresh meat.

"Adam do you have a minute?!"

"Will you marry me!?"

"Can you be the father of my children?! "

There was one fangirl in particular that was distinctive from the others. She had straight strawberry blonde hair and tempting emerald eyes, accompanied by a white t shirt with a giant picture of the band Kara's Flowers slabbed on it. Oh yeah. She was also feverishly pedaling a giant basket bicycle in the direction of Adam's motorcycle.

* * *

The doors flung open, and Adam Levine came into the room with a smile on his broad face.

Regina and Tom were both wearing colorful, silky capes and were in the middle of screaming threats at one another. They stopped instantly when they saw Adam standing in the doorway.

"Are you the one with the insanely awesome British voice?" He asked feverishly.

"Yes, tis I," Tom beamed, still in full costume. "But I think your voice beats mine any day."

Regina hurriedly tore off her fake and wizard hat. "Why hello there Mr. Levine." She said as if she were charming a snake.

Adam looker back at her strangely. "Huge fan of you um- sending everyone to a unknown land and bringing them to misery because your stepdaughter is prettier than you."

She then placed a hand on her chest. "Thank you!"

Then another figure appeared behind the singer.

"Oh-MG- Adam Levine- Maroon 5- sexy-"

"Whoa whoa whoa," Adam through his tattooed arms up to shut her up. "How did you know I would be here?"

The short sixteen year old girl let out a sly grin. "I may have followed you the entire way here..." Then she pulled off her lime green jacket. "Will you- sign- my shirt? The name's Marianne Tremblay."

Adam thought for a moment, then glanced back towards Tom. "How about something first,"

Marianne looked at him with targative eyes.

"Fetch me... A glass of Voss water- bendy straws are a must- a vintage Strumwire guitar, some bacon, and that new Taylor Swift perfume."

They all judgmentally stared.

"...For my mom!"

He was surprised to see Marianne took out a notepad and was hurriedly scribbling things down. "Okay! Back back in a jiffy!"

She turned around and hopped back on bet bike. Then Adam turned his attention back towards Tom.

"Would you like a drink or something?" Regina asked in full sweetness, even batting her eyelashes a bit. He just shook his head quickly for a response.

So Mr. Hiddleston- can I call you Tom? Can you sing at all with that voice? Mickey has had a bad case of laryngitis for days now. Instead of rehearsing he watches Russian soap operas with his grandparents,"

Tom smiled. "Really? You mean it? We can go on tours together, and- and sign stuff together, and be best friends and stuff!"

* * *

Marianne ran up and down the streets of the nearest city like a crazed monkey on steroids. The perfume was the easiest thing to acquire, seeing everything these days had her face splashed onto it. She went into every convenient store and rummaged through the rows of refrigerators searching for the Voss water. Finally, she found it in the section labeled: "Fancy Things Nobody Needs". She grabbed the glass bottle and quickly looked at the price.

"Ten bucks for water?!"

Next came the honey smoked bacon and she was out the door.

* * *

It was three hours later she discovered the Strumwire guitar on EBay for only sixty five dollars. She clicked the super express button that claimed the shipment would arrive in a half hour. Marianne was just about to fetch her bag and leave when she heard someone behind her.

"Why would you need a Strumwire guitar? I thought the only person who knew what it is is Adam-"

"What?" Marianne said nonchalantly, "I don't know what you're talking about..."

The girl suddenly looked interested. "Why do you need one then? Are you a secret agent?"

"Okay you got me!" She said stressfully. "Adam wanted me to get it for him and all he wanted to do was talk to Tom-"

"Tom?" She said excitedly, "what'd he look like?"

"Umm... very British..."

"OMG!" She jumped up into the air, causing everyone around to stare at the two with heavy judgment. "You have to take me with you!"

"No! This is strictly an Adam Levine shopping spree here! Not just a 'come along and meet famous people with me'!"

"I have a car..."

Marianne's eyes lit up. "Come along and meet famous people with me you complete stranger!"

They zoomed out the door and into a light blue Chevy, returning the great city of enchantment.

* * *

An hour past, an hour full of butchering Maroon 5 songs with slightly pitchy voices and fathoming over the greatness of The Red Necklace audiobook.

"Are you sure this is the way home?" Kayla, the amazing, beautiful and talented teen who was obsessed with Tom Hiddleston asked, looking around inquisitively.

Marianne nodded. "Umm.. Yeah, I went this way on my bike, remember? I'm not a cereal killer, promise."

"Says the random person in my car... But hey, you're taking me to see the British man of my dreams, so call any time you want bestie!"

She let out a laugh, then fell silent. After a few seconds, Marianne furrowed her brow.

"Something doesn't feel right here," she muttered, looking around in a constant motion.

Before Kayla could reply, a forceful gust of wind whammed into the car like an atomic bomb hit- then the sun blackened out like a deadened candle, and was replaced by a ghostly darkness.

* * *

**A/N**: Bwahaha! AngryMagic, I hope this was to your satisfaction! And I wonder who this Kayla character is... she seems amazingly awesome... and the type of girl who just loves getting reviews... ;)


	4. The British Invasion

**A/N:** Guys, I am SO SORRY for not updating for a whole month! I've been super busy with school and everything. But here it is! This chapter is dedicated to Marox, who gave the suggestion for Florence and the Machine. :)

* * *

They both glanced around I'm a panicked motion.

"Great," Marianne grumbled, "the powers out."

Kayla leaned up against the wheel of her car, squinting to see just a few feet in front of her.

"Wait- what's that...?" She directed her partner's attention to a silhouette far off in the middle of the road in front of them. It was hard to see through the hazy grey smoke, but it was obvious the figure wasn't human.

"Please tell me the earth hasn't just been invaded by an incomprehensible bunch of temperamental vampires..."

They could see more of the figures appearing; soon, angry drivers beside them began getting out of their cars and wandering hastily but blindly towards the group with flashlights that only gave weak beams of light.

A blast from a blue laser gun whizzed through the empty space, causing the people to flee in terror in every direction- hurriedly typing their apocalypse tweets to twitter.

The smoke was beginning to clear, revealing a heard of frost giants that landed right in the middle of the intersection, leaving a giant crater there.

"Holy crap, we're gonna die!" Both Kayla and Marianne shouted at each other, pulling out their iPhones.

"Wait, what are we doing?!" Kayla said, suddenly exiting her death tweet. "We're fangirls for heavens sake; we can't give up this easily!" She grabbed Marianne's phone out of her hands and threw it in the back. "We are gonna meet our dream celebrities if it kills us!"

The gas petal was floored and the car jerked forward towards the creepy blue aliens.

"Right! So, you have a plan, right?!" Marianne shouted, looking like she was staring into the face of death itself.

"Umm... No not really..." Kayla responded, weaving through the stopped cars towards them.

"WHAT?!"

The temperature in the vehicle plummeted rapidly as they came into full view.

Marianne closed her eyes tight. "Forgive me Adam..."

Then, in a sudden motion, Kayla rolled down her window, grabbed a cup of coffee, and ripped the lid off with her teeth, chucking it out the window towards the alien.

"Only one person is meeting Loki, and it isn't you you sons of bitches!"

The coffee hit the nearest frost giant in full force, resulting in a steamy cloud that rose from the destructing beast.

"We just wanted to hear Adam sing..." He cried out before vanishing completely.

The other frost giants looked at the car as it drove away in shock before beaming back to outer space.

The teenagers looked back at the wreckage triumphantly. "That was awesome!" Marianne exclaimed, still in utter disbelief.

"Ain't nobody getting in the way of fulfilling my petty dreams of marrying a British actor."

"Well, it's safe driving from here on out until Storybrooke,"

* * *

But Marianne and Kayla weren't the only ones deeply affected by the brief alien invasion. After a stop to macdonalds, the band Florence and the Machine were stuck in the massive traffic jam.

"Did you just see that?" Robert Ackroyd said, "someone in that car up there splashed a frost giant with coffee and they left!"

Christopher Hayden have his partner a strange look. "It was just some animals crossing the road, Maine is full of moose, you know. You need to lay off the Avengers obsession man."

Beside him, Isabella let out a frustrated sigh. "Look at this! Tom posted on WhoSay that he's, quote, 'beastin' it up with the Once Upon a Time characters and Adam Levigne, #cantbeatthatloosers'!"

They all gave looks of extreme jealousy. "Tom thinks he's the best British celebrity out there," Rusty Bradshaw scoffed. "That's it! We're heading to Storybrooke to teach that guy a lesson!"

Everyone nodded in agreement.

"Don't you guys have a concert tonight though?" The driver of the tour bus asked.

Tom Monger sighed. "Just give everyone a copy of our CD and have Jennifer Lawerence do some stand up comedy like she did last time. Everyone loved it."

And thus the British Invasion began.

* * *

"So that's why Tom Cruise is so sexy..." Emma face was full of an inner resolvement.

"Shh, it's top secret information," Tom Hiddleston whispered, "you mustn't tell a single soul. Mind control is still a temperamental thing."

Emma nodded, just as the door to the Charming household knocked rapidly. She went to answer the door, revealing two teenage girls looking flustered and energized.

When Kayla saw Tom, she pushed her way through Emma and jumped into his arms.

"I can't believe-this is-I love-frost giants-"

Tom smiled, returning the hug. "You defeated frost giants for me?" He said in disbelief.

Kayla nodded, still smiling like she had won the lottery. "Kayla, ultimate Hiddlestoner of Tumblr, professional fangirl. At your service."

Marianne then caught sight of Adam, running towards him and digging all the supplies out of her backpack.

"Here you go, everything is here, just like you asked!"

Adam looked shocked. "Never has any fangirl completed this task. Congratulations." He engulfed her in Taylor Swift smelling greatness as he hugged her tight.

"Wait. What about the guitar?"

Just as he said it, the doorbell rang again.  
Emma grinned. "Finally, some fangirls for me!" She opened the door, but it wasn't Jennifer Morrison fangirls. Instead, it was Florence and the Machine standing there, holding a big UPS box.

"This was at your door," Florence Welch said, stepping in without an invite. "So Tom, guess you're not the only awesome British celebrity here,"

He simply rolled his eyes. "It's not my fault I'm awesome,"

Then, little footsteps carried down the staircase as a surprised Henry came into view.

"Emma- you got me girls? And Florence and the Machine?! My wish came true!" He shouted happily, leaping into the arms of both Marianne and Kayla, who were more than excited to meet the overactive boy with two straight mothers.

Emma sighed. "Might as well invite everyone else..." She grumbled, picking up the phone.

"Wait- there's a car outside!" Mark Saunders said, a 1963 jaguar coupé pulling up by the front of the house.

"Who else could possibly..." Tom muttered, following everyone else who were exiting quickly through the single door.

They made it out just in time to see a woman wearing an elegant green shimmery dress and an obnoxious feather on top her head get out of the coupé.

Kayla's eyes widened. "Oh my gosh- you're Rachel Weisz!" She squealed, not knowing if she could take any more awesomeness in that day.

The woman looker confused. "No, I am Evanora, grand keeper of the Emerald City."

Kayla shrugged. "Rachel, Evanora, what's the difference? First of all, what are you even doing here? Secondly, can I have an autograph?"

"This car is so bloody stuffy!" Came the voice of Adele, who opened up the passenger side door and walked out.

"What is happening?" Marianne thought she was loosing her head.

"Everybody stop!" Emma shouted, silencing the commotion. "What are you two doing here?!"

Evanora shrugged. "I was told there was a British party going on here, so Adele and I decided to come on by."

"How do you even know Adele if you're from Oz?"

She laughed. "Just because I'm from another dimension doesn't mean I can't love Adele,"

Just then, she caught sight of the sexy british man who was standing away from the crowd; somehow he magically transformed into his grand Loki costume. She found herself slowly walking towards him as if she were frolicking through a flowery field towards an old friend... One that happened to look great in green.

"You're an evil super villain too?" She said, almost breathlessly.

He smiled back. "You, my dear, look magnificent in green."

Everyone else looked at the two awkwardly. "Wow." Marianne said, "never thought I'd have a day like this ever in my life,"

Kayla nodded. "Yeah this is just starting to get weird..."

The rest of the Once Upon a Time gang were just arriving.

"So. Many. British. People." Belle breathed, resisting the urge to let loose the inner fangirl.

Regina folded her arms tightly across her chest when she saw Evanora and Loki. "This city can only have one sexy villain..."

Everyone turned their heads towards the sudden sound of teenage pop music from down the street. It was coming from the One Direction tour bus.

"Oh my god! One direction!" Rumple freaked out, completely letting loose his inner fangirl. Belle rolled her eyes.

Evanora turned her glance away from the pure sexiness in front of her and eyed the One Direction bus, her emerald necklace soon glowing with annoyance. She raised her hand out towards the five hormonal boys with extremely catchy songs and zapped them with fiery green lightning. The awkward silence was soon replaced by Rumple's intense sobbing.

Loki looked back at Evanora with amazement. "We really are perfect for each other," he outstretched his hand out towards her, "care to get a drink with me?"

Evanora blushed. "Sometimes it's difficult to judge when you're caught between the devil and deep green sea."

Before they could walk off though, a voice sounded from not too far away.

"Oh common, not another actor!" Marianne grumbled.

He was a well built man with a crossbow strapped to his back, looking like he came right out of a movie.

"I heard there was a witch around his area," the man said, walking closer to the group.

Florence sighed. "We should've done the concert."

Kayla cocked her head to the side. "Jeremy Renner?"

The man seemed confused. "It is I, Hanzel the great witch hunter from a faraway land."

"Then where's Gretel?" Ruby asked.

The man's face fell slightly. "She got invited to Saturday Night Live... Without me."

"Well the only witch we have here is Evanora over there. You can take her if you want, she's really starting to creep us out with this whole passionate love thing with Loki..."

Hanzel's eyes widened. "Marta?! Is that you?"

Evanora froze. "Oh- Aaron- it's not what it looks like!"

He walked up to her. "You're a witch? How- how could you? And even worse, you're with evil boy over here? I thought you loved me!"

Everyone else simply stood and watched the bartering.

"Well... This is really awkward..." Regina said, voicing everyone's mind.

"Hey Florence and the Machine, how about singing something?" Emma suggested.

"With Adam too!" Marianne added in.

They all shrugged.

"Why not?"

Soon, everyone was singing along to 'The Dog Days are Over' and 'Daylight', well after the sun set on the most awkward Saturday any of them had ever experienced.

* * *

**A/N:** I would love for more people to submit their ideas for who they want in the future chapters! It doesn't matter who it is! Anything goes :)


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